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I WANT THE INTERNET BACK!
Suzy's party was really good. Met loads of cool people.
I went out with those cool people again today. Might see them again, some of them are going to Bexhill too.
One of them is so hot.
I want to go out with everyone sometime before we go back to college/sixth form.
la la la
Typical, when I get to update my journal, I can't think of anything to say :/
xxx
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Thursday, July 15th, 2004
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BRIGHTON
27th July
My Birthday party type thing
The train goes at 9:56am from hastings train station
We might go to the cinema if there's anything good on. Dunno. Depends what everyone wants to do.
And we can meet outside hastings station between 9:30 and 9:45.
Can you text me if you're gonna go please? :)
Thank you please!
(By the way I killed my computer and I haven't died) :D
See you all soon!
xxx
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okay. I did a really stupid thing.
I deleted MSN Messenger from my computer
Can you all leave your email addresses in a comment please?
I was also stupid enough not to have my comtacts saved on my computer.
xx
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"Last night I saw a dream and you were in it. This is it. This place has lots of cages. Just like pet shops or a zoo. You were in a cage too. Although you were a picture, in front of me. You never moved, talked or whatever."
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I am so pissed ooff you couldn't even begin to imagine.
I don't think I've ever wanted to smash something up so bad.
Don't even bother trying to wind me up 'cause you will regret it.
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I lost the exercise book with all of my notes on Educating Rita. Oops.
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I think Richey Edwards writes better lyrics than Nicky Wire. Even though my opinion is probably biased.
Nicky Wire wrote a song about wanting to be a girl. Which is... interesting?
Petrified for the millionth time Slowly my soul evaporates No parachutes No dismal clouds Just this fucking space
I know what's coming I'm not working
Sweating out intelligence Like I don't know what it's clinging to The microwaves And singing with the soundwaves I know what's coming I'm not working
Delirium on helium I am my own experience
I know what's coming I'm not working
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I've been revising english since 10:00 this morning and I don't think I can cope with any more.
Don't think I'll be revising Textiles tonight somehow, oh well, guess I'm gonna be failing them both.
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Wednesday, May 26th, 2004
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Do I have the best layout? Oh I think I do.
Should have been doing english revision today. But I didn't. I did art instead. haha
I decided I HATE drawing people. Observational drawing SUCKS.
And OH MY GOD, I just remembered I had aTextiles exam on friday. shit. I'd forgotten.
Mother is cooking me chicken, pasta and peas. What a way to end the day :/ At least she's trying, bless her.
<3
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Heifer whines could be human cries closer comes the screaming knife this beautiful creature must die this beautiful creature must die a death for no reason and death for no reason is MURDER and the flesh you so fancifully fry is not succulent, tasty or nice it is death for no reason and death for no reason is MURDER and the calf that you carve with a smile is MURDER and the turkey you festively slice is MURDER do you know how animals die? kitchen aromas aren't very homely it's not "comforting", "cheery" or "kind" it's sizzling blood and the unholy stench of MURDER it's not "natural", "normal" or kind the flesh you so fancifully fry the meat in your mouth as you savour the flavour of MURDER NO, NO, NO, IT'S MURDER NO, NO, NO, IT'S MURDER who hears when animals cry?
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So. Module tests today.
I think I did quite well considering a) I arrived at the exam and realised I didn't even know what modules we were taking ^_^ b) after getting into the exam and sitting down, I had to wait for about half an hour for a question paper, because there wasn't enough. I wasn't impressed.
The module 8 one was easy. Just common sense. Totally fucked up module 12 though. I don't even want to know what my results are in that, I didn't know the answer to any of the questions :/
Went to see miss mills after the exam, to ick up my folder, and was talking to her for a while, much to the annoyance of her year 7/8/9 class (I couldn't tell). She was asking me what I planned to do with art before friday and how study leave was going, blah blah. haha.
I just drew Avril Lavigne, Kurt Cobain and Brian Molko. W00t. plan to do some more pics of famous people sometime.
I'm now really bored. Bye.
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I joined a bajillion communities yesterday and now my friends page has way too many new entries on it.
I also got 4 new albums today: Lipstic Traces (Manic Street Preachers) Highly Evolved (The Vines) Human Conditions (Richard Ashcroft) Onka's Big Moka (Toploader)
They're all great xD
Can't wait to go to Tunbridge Wells tomorrow. I found a cool jacket type thing in TopShop today and I want to buy it! It was £45 but well worth it. Everyone'll probably hate it. But haha. I don't care <33 I also need a new bag seeing as mine has fallen appart.
This Vines album is weird.. it doesn't sound anything like them :/ It's good though.
And HAHAHAHAHAHA Manic Street Preachers do a cover of Bright Eyes by Art Garfunkel o.O It's... interesting
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Okay.
I have a Foo Fighters hoody. It's size Large and waaaay to big for me, so I want to sell it. I bought it for £30 and have worn it about twice, so you can have it for £15-20?
Comment oor IM me if you're interested in having it.
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Pete Doherty and Carl Barat are in love. haha. It's so obvious.
Also, Pete's probably gonna die before Christmas. Getting high on crack then shooting up heroin as a way of getting back down again? Fucking divvy.
I'll be surprised if they manage to play Reading.
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Wednesday, May 19th, 2004
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I talked to God in a phonebox on my way home. I told you my answer, I left you my dreams, on your answer machine. But I'm a million different people, form one day to the next. Yes there's love if you want it, don't sound like no sonnet. My Lord, my Love. The world don't stop. There ain't no time for cracking up. Believe me friend, happiness more or less, it's just a change in me. Something in my liberty. Here we are the rolling people, can't stay for long, we gotta go. There ain't no space and time to keep our love alive. We have existence but that's all we share. Yes, I'm coming down, your beauty is a colour, surround into the half light. Mother, velvet morning for me. Tie yourself to the mast my friend and the storm will end, if heaven calls I'm coming too. Just like you said, if you leave my life I'm better off dead. Rise straight to the light, in or out of time. No time for sad lament. A wasted life is bitter spent. Child within has healing ways, it sees me through my darkest days. Keep catching the butterfly in that dream of mine. In a neon wilderness, he was restless.
Escape loneliness for a new address.
Oh yeah, I got a new email address. So if anyone uses MSN and wants to add me... Feel free to. aesthetic_fanatic@hotmail.com
I think I might start using this journal again. I dunno. I'll try and sort out the layout or something. I want to have a frinds only lj but I can't be assed to go back and change all my old entries to friends only.
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I'm having a really weird conversation with someone I never thought I'd be speaking to. But enough said.
Onto the reason why I made this post:
I AM SO PISSED OF WITH PEOPLE THINKING I'M TRYING TO BE LIKE LOIS! LIKE I'M SOME FUCKING CLONE OR SOMETHING. Why would I try and be exactly like her? I know she's my best friend but therer ARE things about her that I don't like. As there is everyone I know. And I am getting to sick of people trying to make out tht we're the same. Just because we're best friends, and spend alot of time together, doesn't mean we're the same.
Differences
1. We don't look the same. If I wanted to be like her wouldn't I have the same hair, do the same make-up, wear the same clothes?
2. We have totally different sense of style.
3. We are into completely different bands. The only bands we both like are Placebo, Brand New and Taking back Sunday. I like a whole load of indie stuff (which she hates) and she's into punk, pop punk etc (which I hate)
4. We're interested in totally different things. I'm obsessed with art, and she hates it. She's obsessed with the internet and I'm not.
5. We talk to and are friends with different people.
Things we have in common..
1. Using the xD face? Which is a pathetic simularity but stupid, petty people seem to have pointed it out.
2. Being into music? which, to be honest, isn't everyone?
3. And I've run out of things...
Basically. Anyone who thinks I'm a 'clone' of Lois obviously doesn't know me at all. And should go fuck themselves.
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I GOT IN TO SURREY INSTITUTE OF ART AND DESIGN SUMMER SCHOOL. Yay. And can you add broken_x_inside to your friends list if you haven't already. Thanks :D
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Wednesday, May 12th, 2004
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So. It's the end.
Today has been the weirdest day of my whole time at school. I know I'm going to remember it like I do the last day of Primary school. Just because it was so sad!
I can't believe the Leavers Assembely actually made me cry. It was the music. And the lyrics. Just.. ergh.
Okay. Messages to people. (I'd like to point out that I'm almost crying AGAIN now. Because I'm being all emo xD )
( Messages to Kirstie, Lois <3 )
Don't start saying that I'm being stupid coz I'll see you all again and it's not like I'm dying. But it won't be the same.
I met loads of cool people (especially in year 10-11 xD ) and I won't forget any of you! So you'd better not forget me!
And damn you Lois for writing that song. You made me cry. AND damn you for making me cry earlier too heh
Goodbye to 5 years at The Grove.
The End
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